2014: A Huge Disappointment

I went into 2014 thinking this was the year I'd finally have another breakthrough in the marathon, that I would smash all of my PRs, that I would be injury free. Little did I know at the time, 2014 had something else In store for me.

I started the year out strong. Running outside when I could- which wasn't very much do to the extreme cold polar vortex shit that descended upon Chicago.

I was happy to see the pancake ice again swaying in the lake.

I ran long runs on the treadmill before work nearly every week that I was training for Knoxville. Yay for waking up at 3am to run 20 miles before work on a Thursday. Yay.

All that work paid off when I ran my 2nd fastest marathon ever on a hilly beast of a course. I was nearly all smiles for 26.2, which was exactly what I needed after I blew up at Fox Valley in 2013 due to fu$king hormones.

I took some time off running post Knoxville. I thought- maybe I could run another late spring marathon and BQ!

I went for a run one night while it was kinda stormy at the end of April. It was gorgeous. I remember speeding up the last 4 miles to out kick the fast approaching storm and get some burgers from 5 Guys.

The last photo I took before my cankle returned.

The next morning I ran on the treadmill and a familiar pain started in my calf/ankle. I was devastated. I knew that the Tendinosis of the peroneal tendon had returned.

I took some time off, and it started feeling better so I ran the inaugural Original 5k put on by fleet feet. But I knew that I had a long couple of months before I would be able to run again.

I started going to PT, something which lasted 4 months. I started lap swimming in a pool.

I even got to the point where I thought doing a triathlon would be a good idea. Because so much of the race would be activities which wouldn't hurt my ankle.

I knew my old blue specialized bike would be up to the challenge.

I even bought a wet suit so I could practice some open water swims, because I was "all in" for the TRI.

The triathlon was a blast and I was so happy to finally give a multisport race a chance.


After 4 months of PT, including 4 weeks of absolutely NO RUNNING, I graduated and started running little by little again. Of course now it was cold out and not my favorite time of year to run. I love sweating my balls off during the summer. Layering up and freezing to death just sucks for me.
But I was happy to be able to run in hot weather for a week in Brasil. It was springtime there after all.

So 2014 was a huge disappointment for running (once again). I didn't get a single PR and got injured again. I only ran 3 races, only one of which I actually "raced."

The interesting thing is that I feel 2014 was one of the best years athletically for me. I ran a decent marathon, learned how to swim (beyond the dog paddle), completed a triathlon, and most important- took care of myself by going to PT.

In May, right after the tendinosis returned, I contemplated giving up running entirely. I've been plagued with injuries for as long as I've been running- 15+ years and felt it was no longer worth it to continue on with these injury cycles and damage my tendons further. But before giving up entirely, I gave PT a shot. Best. Decision. Ever.


After more consistent running including long runs and fast paced runs recently, I finally feel the tendinosis won't return. With 3 days left in December, I will surpass my 2013 December running mileage.

So while 2014 was a huge disappointment for my running, It ended up being the best thing that could have happened to me because I finally got the help I needed to sort out the imbalances and weak hips which were causing chronic issues for me.

So here's to a much better 2015. It can only get better from here.

I graduated from PT!!!

Today I graduated from Physical Therapy at Athletico. I had been going 2x a week for 4.5 months! During that time I realized many things.

First and foremost: if your hips are weak, (and you're not doing anything to strengthen them) it is only a matter of time before something breaks down- whether it be your ankle, Achilles, or knee. Trust me. You will break down sooner than later.

You will probably not display any hip issues- but you can rest assured your ITB, your calf pain, etx is almost certainly related to your weak hips and core.

If you take time off running, like a significant amount of time, (at least 4 weeks so you can "forget" some of your bad bio mechanics), and during that time- strengthen your core and hips, the next time you run you will feel balanced and powerful with less effort. But remember that it will take a while to unlearn all the bad bio mechanics from decades of use.

The photo above was from when I ran the Knoxville marathon- about a month before my peroneal tendinosis returned. Look how janky my stride is. Look at all that excess movement. Look how my hips are not straight. Look how unbalanced I am. And this was early on in the race before I became truly fatigued.

So when the tendinosis came back a 2nd time I had to make a very important decision. Would I pursue PT to attempt to work out what was causing chronic issues on my right leg, or would I just give up on running?

I like goals and crushing them. But, I hate being injured. I've been stagnant time wise in my last few marathons because I was always starting from scratch after coming off an injury layoff. At what point do I move onto other activities that don't cause me physical harm? Maybe running isn't for me?

I decided for the benefit of my long term health to start going to PT. I know chronic bouts of tendinosis can lead to greater problems down the road including surgery. And that is a road I didn't want to travel down ever.

So as a last ditch effort to save my running hobby and most importantly- for my long term health, I started going to PT. I made it very clear in the beginning I wasn't there for a temporary fix so I could run a marathon in a few months, but instead was there looking for a long term solution to fix the issues that only happen my right side FOR GOOD.

My PT, Kim and I clicked right away. She is clearly knowledgable and also fit my ideals for treatment. No orthotics, no shoe inserts, no changing shoes. I was the one that needed the fixing.

2 months into PT and my form was already improving- IronGirl Triathlon.

I started with very basic, easy exercises which made my hips burn and as the weeks and months progressed, the exercises got tweaked to make them more and more difficult. It is amazing to see the progress I've made. I now have quite the arsenal of hip/core strengthening exercises to do at home. Which I do 4-6 times a week.

Most recently I took 4 weeks off running to give my Cankle a final reset to let it calm the eff down. (We were splitting hairs at this point- I had no pain- only very minor discomfort when I poked at a very specific spot) when I ran for the first time on Sunday, I felt powerful and balanced. I never noticed feeling janky before, but after taking a month off and "forgetting" some of the bad muscle memory, it was like night and day.


From yesterday's run- solid as a freaking rock, hips level, no more (or at least waaaay less) left leg kick out.

I'm excited to gradually build back some mileage. I'm excited that I can start thinking of long term running goals again. But at the same time I have a good balance between life and my running hobby which I won't forget.

Me and my chicken wings hamming it up in the gym.

Seeing the progress I've made with PT also made me start strength training- especially my scrawny little chicken wings. I've been upping the weights over the months and marveling at the progress I've made with strength too.

I saw some tangible results with my PT:

8% increase in ankle movement when winging my foot out.

15% increase in flexed foot movement.

Ridiculous amount of hip strength- where at my first visit, Kim pushed my leg to the table, Monday my leg held firm and did not budge when being pushed towards the table.

I'm encouraged by all of these improvements and will continue to do 30 minutes of these exercises 4-6 times a week so that I do not lose the benefit of all the money and time I put into Physical Therapy and my long term health.

My last day of PT! {sad face}

My current plan is to continue walk/running for the next 2 weeks- taking at a minimum 2 days off between runs and then gradually getting to short runs. I'll also continue cycling and using the elliptical. I'm in no rush to run fast or far again. My only goal is to remain healthy.


I am confident I made the right decision to go to physical therapy for my right leg issues.

Yay, physical therapy. Yay.

When the Cankle Howled

I feel like American "culture" is lacking in many ways. One of the things that rubs me the wrong way is our "fast food culture" of thought. It permeates nearly every aspect of our lives- we can get meals fast (duh), there are gizmos to help us do X faster, and pills & "miracles" to lose weight fast among 1000's of other "do this quicker" schemes. We are always looking for the quick (lazy half-assed) way because that's what is being shoved down our throats every place we turn.

CB doesn't want to hear me talk about this anymore.

This week post Monday's PT session- and once my ankle cooled down from the Graston, I was feeling good. For the first time in 6 weeks, my Cankle wasn't full of hate in the morning.

I was looking forward to my 3rd PT session Friday afternoon. I was prepared to ask the PT if I could start running again. I was dreaming about participating in some of my favorite fall races. After some "side steps" and "monsters" I climbed up onto the table. 10 seconds into the Graston, I winced in pain as the tool touched something very tender on my Cankle. And that was the end of Graston for the day. The PT massaged my Cankle and I finished the rest of my exercises.

My face when the cankle howled.

I did end up getting the "return to running" program from the PT but am hesitant to even start that. I want to do the right thing with my ankle which involves letting it heal, and doing all my PT prescribed exercises religiously at home. Talking about long term here.

I was so bummed sitting on the table after the graston incident. I went from incredibly encouraged that this Cankle shit was almost behind me to stewing in anger that I had to reconsider everything and abandon the pipe dreams I had created again. I knew this process would take a while- last time I got the tendonitis it took 6+ months for me not to feel it anymore. I didn't seek treatment for it back then. But this time I got sucked into the "fast food culture" that after 3 PT sessions, my Cankle was nearly healed and I could start easing back into my pre Cankle activities because it was feeling happy again.

My takeaway from this Friday's meltdown is that I need to be patient and not rush this and not get sucked into our lazy ass American mentality of "we can totes rush this process MOAR SHORTCUT FASTER QUICK."


-Xaar

Having loads of fun, no running involved.

Graston + PT + Hips

2 PT sessions in, I'm feeling super encouraged that I've made a good decision to commit to 2 sessions a week.

The discomfort in my ankle is nearly gone, but no surprise there since I refuse to run on it until it's better and until I have some solid time behind me with PT. Because if I were to just run on it now, it would likely come back because the main issue hasn't been fixed yet. And that would just be f&cking dumb.

not running = walks with the pup & imitating sculptures

My outer hips are pretty weak which are likely contributing (along with janky biomechanics) my knees to turn in excessively while running, causing extra stress on my ankle. My PT said not to run for another week, so maybe this weekend I'll be able to test out a few easy miles, but I'm ok waiting more to ensure I put myself in the best position for recovery.
I had graston done for the first time yesterday. At first I was intimidated by a large heavy metal instrument being rubbed on my tender ankle, but the actual movements didn't hurt at all. After 10 minutes there was a noticeable red patch on one small segment of my ankle- which the PT said was the inflamed area. Ever since, it's been a little cranky which was to be expected.
Swimming:

I started swimming on Saturday. I managed 900 yards with breaks between every 50 yard lap. I can't freaking breathe. Sunday's 1000 yards went slightly better but I need to learn how to breathe. I had wanted to do a triathlon later this summer, but am now entirely convinced an open water swim could possibly kill me. I'm currently looking into swim lessons.

Running thoughts:

I've been struggling with pulling back from running and running goals. I love running more than cycling and swimming but my long term health is more important than any PR or BQ. I was still thinking (delusional) I had enough time to train and squeak out a BQ in September, but the rational side of me says STOP. And I am. And it's difficult. And I know I'll be putting myself in the best possible position for success whenever that happens in the future.

I don't understand why he is cheering for the Netherlands...

World Cup!

I've been enjoying watching many of the games and seeing some major upsets which will enable Brasil or the USA to go far and *hopefully* win the cup.

VAI BRASIL!

L and I went out to Grant park last night for the first of 3 viewing parties US soccer is sponsoring. We got there literally 3 minutes before the game started and were in the middle of the crowd when Dempsey scored the first goal 32 seconds in.

It was amazing watching the crowd erupt into celebration!

GOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

We left after the first half to check out a new bar that opened near us but ended up at another place for dinner and to watch the rest of the game due to the crowds.

I might return to grant park Sunday to watch USA v Portugal with some friends because even though it was hot, it was ridiculously fun.
Im seriously bummed I can't watch the Brasil v Mexico game at 2pm today. Maybe I'll get "sick" today at 1pm??? Hehe

I have to say not having a training plan looming over my head like a big dark cloud is so incredibly wonderful because I can go enjoy activities without feeling "guilty" for bailing on a run or workout. I'm almost spending more time working out now than before and enjoying life a hell of a lot more.

Vai Brasil!

-Xaar

A step in the right direction

I've been so frustrated with this cankle issue. 5 weeks ago it came out of nowhere just like it did 2 weeks before the 2012 Fox Valley Marathon. The main difference between this time and last time is i've pretty much stopped running since it happened, save for the first week when I was in NYC and HAD to run in Central Park. The result (not surprising): It has significantly improved and I feel very little discomfort in my cankle.

But it's still present.

I'm giving it all the TLC I possibly can to ensure it goes away fast. It is killing me that I cannot go run right now- specially with the great weather we've been having. I'm so bummed about this cankle thing. Some days I feel the way CB looks below- and I'm all "I MIGHT BE ABLE TO START RUNNING AGAIN" and then the next day the cankle is cranky and then I feel so bummed about the situation because it has been 5 weeks and while it's better, I don't feel comfortable running on it again. I'd hate to aggravate it more and set myself back.
I went to Athletico for an injury screening about my cankle. I hit some sort of breaking point this week and made the appointment not because of the cankle, but because i'm sick of this continual cycle of injuries i'm in. I love running, I love getting faster and improving and I feel like each time I take 2 steps forward, I end up taking 1.85 steps back.

My legs were poked, twisted, and tested for strength and movement. Surprisingly, my hips are strong, have little to no imbalance issues on my legs, and have good range of motion- although the right (problem child) leg has a little less range of movement than the left probably due to the tendon issue.

The likely diagnosis was tendinitis of the peroneal tendons. I was told they seem tight, although I still have decent range of motion. My right hip is also more forward than my left I've got some exercises to do to help fix the hip issue. The calf also could be the root of my issues. But it's so difficult to know for sure.

I never considered PT or ART before, but lately i've been thinking how what I have done in the past (nothing) hasn't changed the fact my right lower leg consistently has issues. This past week I was debating whether or not I would give up going after any serious running goals so I could (eventually) continue to just run and simply enjoy it. Consistency over time is the only real way to have big gains- being injured just doesn't fit into the improve at running equation. I came to the conclusion that doing something should yield better results than my usual "do nothing" and I need to give that "something" a try.
My next steps are to get a referral from my doctor, get a gait analysis and start some PT on whatever is wonky. In the meantime, I'm going to continue cycling and start swimming laps in the very near future.

I'm excited to set this all in motion and hopefully fix my janky right leg.

I hope this will be a step in the right direction.



-Xaar

Cankle Dreamin'

Last night I soaked my crankle in Dead Sea salts because they are so much better than Epsom. And then continued the ultra fun night by using my arsenal of running related massagers to dig deep into my calf. Started with the foam roller then progressed to the TP foot baller. I even lightly foam rolled the ankle. Ouch. I took an aleve before bed for another ailment and fell asleep.


I had a dream where I was at a hotel and had to get to a race start. My cankle still had the same crankiness as it does in real life so I was concerned about running the race since that would be the first time I ran in a while.

I also had to get to the start of the race- which I ended up choosing my bike because taxis would take too long in traffic. I got to the start and checked my bag and lined up for the start.


And then I woke up.

Womp.

I tried to go back to sleep because I wanted to know the outcome of the race. Mainly if my ankle would hurt or not. (I MEAN CMON THATS THE ONLY THING I CARE ABOUT NOW)

I woke up this morning and my ankle wasn't nearly as cranky as before. In fact it almost feels normal. I'm contemplating a very short run (like one mile) after work to get my bib for the Original 5k that I'm running or "yogging" this weekend.


I'll be cycling to the start of that race, just as in my dream. I hope my ankle is up for an easy 5k Saturday morning.


I'm looking forward to running the The Original 5k Saturday. I've got some sweet Chicago sweatbands to compliment the "throwback" theme of this race. That is, if CB lets me have them back...

-Xaar

Another fabulous week in the books.

Only 50 miles this week. All cycling. Nothing to write home about. I took some extra rest days because I felt like it. I'm not training for anything, so no sense in feeling "guilty" for only working out 3 hours and 42 minutes last week (not counting strength training if anyone is counting).

My new swimsuit fits, but when I went to use the resistance pool it didn't turn on. FML. So now I'm looking into a few options for swimming laps. I have to keep reminding myself this ankle issue is temporary and if I continue working out in a way that doesn't piss my ankle off, plus stay diligent with strength training, I'll be better off than before this "injury."


The first time I was called "Sharlon" this year. Lol.


I'm surprised how "chill" I am about this whole ankle thing. I mean, it will totally get better at some point. Races will still be waiting for me with open arms. Boston will have a place for me when I finally do qualify. Just no use stressing over something that needs some time. I'll probably try an easy run or 2 this week to see how it's doing.


To continue off of last week's week of firsts, I took note of even more firsts that happened. I got my first pair of "Chucks."


I got a fitbit. So snazzy in an obnoxious green color like my Chucks.


I spectated the Soldier Field 10 for the second time. I'm on the "run every other year plan" for this race.


I cycled south on the lakefront and got to see nearly everyone I was "cheering" for. (I'm terribly awkward at cheering encouraging things to strangers, so I cheer for my friends and take loads of photos) It really couldn't have been a better day for a race.


After the race I went to the "West Loop Craft Beer Festival" for the first time. It was in a block party format with over 60 breweries- many of which I had never heard of (read: very small local ones) and all had delicious beer.


The weather was perfect.


All the beerz, all the smiles.

Check out dem pretzel necklaces below.


All the beerz and all the friendz.


We finished out the holiday whirlwind weekend with friends and grilled foods and a 41% abv beer "Sink the Bismark!" By Brewdogs. Needless to say we didn't come close to killing that bottle...


My "goals" workout wise for this week mainly include getting back to 7-8 hours of workouts and doing more strength training. And finally swimming a few laps. And hopefully running a few miles if the ankle cooperates...

-Xaar

Stupid cankle, why you no like me?

Reading a Running Times while cycling in an 85 degree stuffy gym is so totes amazeballs. NOT


Taken on My last run before the ankle got mad at me.

I'm on a self imposed running hiatus, length unknown. That sounds way more dramatic than it is. My ankle started bugging me in the same way it did before Fox Valley in 2012. So being the mature, responsible person I am, I decided to call it quits with running for a bit. Well, at least after a few runs on the Highline, West Side Highway, Central Park because I was in NYC and how could I NOT go run!? I also had one last run with Kim in Chicago because she wanted to run with me before work and how could I say no to her!?!


The good thing is there's no swelling, and it warms up after 3-4 miles. But leaves my Cankle throbbing once I get cooled down.


Dressed up all fancy Black tie for a wedding only to sit at the bar the entire night while my cankle howled in discomfort.

In this self imposed downtime (last week I ran 5.5 miles and had a whopping 6 days of no workouts!) I realized some things.

•I'm happy to have not registered for any future races. I wasn't too jazzed about anything anyways except for Fleet Feet racing team. But FF and races will be there for me when I'm ready to return.

•Not working out makes my mood take a nosedive.

•When not exercising regularly it is not advisable to eat all the things and drink all the booze.

•Balance is super totes important. I have annoyed the shit out of my husband with running talk and thankfully have managed to get that under control. My god there's so much more to life than running, training and OMG races.


having fun on the lakefront where no running was involved. *gasp*

I'm using this minor annoyance as an opportunity to become a more well rounded athlete and person. I'm researching swim stuffs like suits and goggles so I can finally use the resistance pool in our gym. I'm also taking this "time off" to strength train a lot more than my usual half assed 2x weekly sessions.


I miss NYC way more than I ever thought possible. I do not miss Times Square however.

I'm just hoping this ankle thing is a one off and clears up quick so I can get back to running the lakefront again or NYC or anywhere pain/ discomfort free.



- xaar